Happy New Week. I hope this post finds you well.
Okay so last Saturday, on a six-hour road trip back from my friend’s graduation, me and my girls had a number of scintillating conversations. We touched on everything. From traveling to family, politics to health care. Eventually, the conversation to an insightful turn to the topic: love language.
OA: Do you know what your love languages are?
Me: Umm no, what is that exactly?
OA: Some doctor wrote a book called The Five Love Languages. According to this Dr. Gary Chapman, there are five universal ways by which all people express and interpret love. Everyone has a primary and secondary love language and for the most part, people tend to give love in the way they rather receive love.
Me: But what if the way you give love isn’t how I want to receive it?
OA: That’s the thing, this happens all the time and when it does, eventually you will grow distant or separate yourself from the person who isn’t communicating in your love language.
Me: OMG how do I find out mine????
OA: I’ll read them all. See which designates with you.
Because I love you guys and I share everything, please find the five love languages below:
- Words of Affirmation: According to Dr. Chapman some people prefer words of affirmation like “I love you”, “you mean the world to me”, “I miss you” and other compliments. They value this above anything else. On the flip side, negative words and insults cut deep are not easily forgiven.
- Quality time: This language is all about giving the other person your undivided attention. In this case, being a loved one’s main focus leaves quality timers feeling satisfied and comforted. Being there for them is crucial and distractions, postponed dates can be especially hurtful to these individuals.
- Receiving gifts: Here, what makes them feel most loved is to receive a gift. This doesn’t make them shallow; a meaningful gift makes them feel appreciated.
- Acts of Service: Actions speak louder than words in this language. People who fall under this category want their loved ones to know they are struggling and to help them out in some way. Lending a hand shows them you genuinely care.
- Physical touch: People here seek everyday physical connections. This isn’t limited to intercourse but handholding, kissing or any type of re-affirming physical contact is appreciated.
Before I close, I wanted to note the following:
- The fact that someone identifies with one love language shouldn’t prevent you from expressing all the others.
- This doesn’t just work with just romantic relationships. After hearing this, I started to think about the different people in my life and found that this can be applied for a better bond with anyone. Example; my niece is a #1 while my nephew #2. You can be rest assured I will use this tool to become aunty of the year.
- Please please please do you ask your someone for theirs, only to use it against them. Leave satan in hell!
There you have it folks lol.
More than anything, I’d love to hear what you think. I’d also love to know what your love language is… Hahaha indulge me.
Thank you so much for reading! Enjoy the rest of your week.
The Wawa-New Yorker
P.S. – You know I wouldn’t ask yours without telling you mine lol. In case you were wondering, my primary love language is quality time.